Looking for a Sugar Daddy

April 30, 2015

It feels like we’re going backward. Here’s Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, telling women to blaze a trail for women to take on leadership roles and, just this past month, I’ve had several female clients tell me that they are looking for a sugar daddy.

These women are all successful and in challenging careers and, over the years, they have talked about the thrill they feel about being independent, making their own decisions, and not being accountable to anyone for their time or their costly purchases.

So, why the sudden desire to marry rich men who will support them in the style to which they are accustomed? What happened to the thrill they feel about being independent and making their own financial decisions?

As close as I can figure out, the first five or ten years of total independence are exciting. No one can tell you what to do and there are no expectations on a personal level. If you’re too tired to cook when you get home from work, a can of tuna will do fine for dinner. If you’ve cleaned the house, it can stay clean because no one is there to make a mess. Sounds good to me.

So why this sudden change of attitude? From what I’ve seen and heard, after ten years of being on their own they want someone else to share their burdens. They want someone else to be responsible for paying the bills and paying off their mortgage. According to an article I read, people who are making $75,000 a year are living from paycheck to paycheck. And that’s the problem.

Apparently, the only industry that is making out well is the restaurant business because people are eating out almost every night and their money is being spent on restaurants and entertainment. They’ve raised their own standard of living and now they don’t want to go back to living within their means.

I’m an economist by nature. I don’t like being in debt and I don’t like waste. To my way of thinking, dining out should be seen as something special, not taken for granted. There are definitely times that you are too tired to cook and clean up after yourself and if you don’t make a habit of it, it’s okay to go out to eat that night.

But $75,000 a year on restaurants and entertainment and having to live from paycheck to paycheck? I have better things to do with my money. And that explains why so many women are suddenly interested in looking for a sugar daddy.

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