One of the most destructive patterns of behavior to break is the pattern of giving up and giving in whenever something gets a little difficult. That’s when you hear all the excuses people can pull out of their excuse bag for why they can’t do something or for why they are taking a break from whatever it is they are doing.
We see so many people who live down to their potential rather than go that extra mile to succeed, especially when they aren’t facing insurmountable odds. It could be a case of fear of success or fear of failure; it doesn’t matter which it is because the behavior is the same. They give up and they give in and they take the path of least resistance.
They also come up with the most logical and persuasive excuses in the book for why they can’t do something or for why they are delaying action. Unfortunately, this trait of giving up and giving in, doesn’t make them happy. They feel like failures so they latch onto someone or something, that is much less challenging, to feel better about themselves.
Many of these people want you to think they are too busy to finish what they started so they make themselves so busy with other things to give the illusion that they just had to delay or stop their other project. They think that if they look too busy, you won’t discover their defeatist attitude.
But the common thread is still there. They have reached a point where they have run out of self-confidence or they don’t want to work so hard, so they pull back and latch onto something they can do more easily, or they latch onto a relationship where they can feel superior.
When you look at this defeatist pattern of behavior, you don’t see a happy individual. You usually see someone who has unreasonably high expectations of himself or has goals far in excess of his talents. And then you can sit back and wait for the moment which you know, with absolute certainty, is coming for him to find an excuse for giving up.
No one likes to see himself unmasked but that’s the beginning of overcoming this crippling pattern of behavior. The rest of it lies in making himself finish whatever he starts and making sure he only takes on the things that are within the scope of his abilities.