Sometimes it seems as though we are living in a disposable world. We’ve gone from disposable tissues, to disposable diapers, to disposable spouses, to disposable income. It’s almost as though we are holding someone’s place, waiting for them to fill it after we’re through with it.
Most couples who marry young go through a growth spurt and they often outgrow their partner. Their interests change and, consequently, their needs also change. If they are in the same career or the same business, it’s possible they can grow together but, more often than not, they drift apart until, suddenly, one of them feels the need to change the status quo.
Transitions can be scary but they can also be great opportunities. It can be a wonderful adventure where you feel as though you are starting with a blank canvas and you can fill it with anything that catches your interest. On the other hand, if you let yourself slide into fear, it can be a nightmare.
It’s so easy to get into a rut. Fear can do that. You can feel a physical and emotional paralysis and not have the energy to think beyond your crisis. But if you force yourself to take small steps each day, it might not be necessary for life to throw you in at the deep end in a sink or swim crisis.
Divorce or widowhood doesn’t have to be the end of the world. It could open doors that you never knew were shut. You could discover hidden talents that would never have come to light if you had stayed married.
I’m not suggesting that everyone gets divorced just to discover their hidden talents and opportunities for growth. However, I am saying that if it happens, don’t be afraid of it. You may discover that if you had stayed married, you’d never have tried to develop those talents.
Maybe with people living longer these days, we’re meant to be place holders for other people and they’re meant to be place holders for us. Maybe we’re all just part of this disposable society for our own growth and development and maybe we’re part of this disposable society for the growth and development of others. I have a feeling that someday, before the end of our life, we’ll find the answers.