It’s an odd realization to know that people often think that the grass is greener on the other side. We look at people in the news and think that their lives are richer, more interesting, more financially stable than ours, and it diminishes what we have in our own eyes.
People often look for the fairy tale version of life rather than look at the way it really is. And, who can blame them? Reality often sucks. It’s hard. it’s painful, it’s debilitating, and it takes a lot of courage and determination to change it. So, yes, a little dose of Fantasyland is very appealing.
My grandmother used to say that if everyone hung their troubles out on a clothesline, they’d rush to take their own troubles off the clothesline before anyone saw them. In all the years I knew her, I never heard her talking about her troubles; she didn’t believe in airing her problems for public consumption.
We often hear people say that a problem shared is a problem halved but that’s not necessarily true. If you’ve ever listened to someone talk about the frustrations of dealing with his or her boss, you’ll probably hear people agreeing with him or her and adding their opinions to the mix. Same with relationships. Talk about an argument with your spouse, and people will chime in with their opinions, making you relive your argument and getting you angrier and angrier by the minute.
Many people feel better when they talk about their problems to other people and that’s fine, if they don’t allow the opinions of others to sway them or to get them more agitated than they were.
The problem with telling people your troubles is that most people want to give you advice, but taking their advice could be the worst thing you could do.
How do you tell someone that you just want to vent but you don’t want their opinion and you don’t want to hear their solution? You really can’t do that. Once you open up the discussion it’s a free-for-all and you get unwanted opinions and advice when all you wanted to do was get something off your chest.
My grass may not be as green as the lawn across the street but it’s green enough for me. I may not have as much of anything as the next one, but what I have is perfect for me.