The Reality of Your Cyberlife

August 24, 2014

As a very private person who, not surprisingly, is also an introvert, I keep wondering at the pull that social media sites have on the majority of people. I realize that most people want to feel loved and accepted, and they also want to feel that they are included in whatever everyone else is doing.

I once made an experiment. All right, I made that experiment several times, not just once. I had been involved in some relationships where I was expending a lot of time and energy on some acquaintances who were called friends, and I wasn’t feeling emotionally fulfilled. These people were all saying the right words but something kept niggling in the back of my mind that they were just words that didn’t mean anything.

If words alone, could give me the feeling of being loved and accepted for who and what I am, then I would be the most loved and accepted person on this planet. But words have never been enough for me; I have to feel those words at a very deep level. There are people who go around saying “I love you” to everyone but they often lack substance. And it’s not even about actions speaking louder than words because people often do the right things for the wrong reasons.

Most of those relationships just drifted away without my having to actually end them. In retrospect, they were easy to end because I wasn’t feeling the ties that bind of my deep relationships. And this brings us to the social media sites.

For a few years, I was on some message boards where a whole group of nasty people migrated from one message board to another; they were truly the kind of people I wouldn’t invite to my house. And then I found a message board where the people were very nice and I loved going there. Every day, and all throughout the day and night, whenever I had a few moments, I would check to see who had posted what, and then I would spend hours replying to them.

The message boards eventually shut down and, what I discovered, was that I now had a lot of time on my hands. Nature doesn’t like a vacuum and I filled this vacuum with my real life relationships which continue to give me the emotional fulfillment that the message boards could not.

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